Hadrian's Wall Given £500,000 Boost

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Wednesday, 11 April 2012

image for Hadrian's Wall Given £500,000 Boost
Another historic wall, yesterday.

English security services and locals were celebrating today after they learned that Hadrian's Wall had secured a £500k SITA grant.

The £537,185 grant has been made to help fund a project, managed by Hadrian's Wall Heritage.

Said a Heritage spokesman: "This is fantastic news. The grant means parts of the central section of Hadrian's Wall, some of which are currently on English Heritage's Heritage at Risk register, can be properly conserved.

"This is essential work because over recent months and years we have seen increasing numbers of raids from the Pict lands on the other side of the wall.

"The barbarians descend on the local villages and steal our sheep and carry off our women.

"Hopefully, the improvements will also finally end any speculation that Rangers and Celtic will join the English Premier League."

Survey work will begin in May and the full project is expected to be completed in August 2013.

SITA Trust is an independent environmental funding body which allocates funds contributed by SITA UK, one of the UK's largest recycling and resource management companies.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot