Chancellor George Osborne has been shocked to discover that multi-millionaires in Britain are, on average, paying income tax at about 10/%.
'I am happy to provide these good people - the creators of wealth who stand between this country and disaster - with advice from my financial expert who regularly advises me on the best means of avoiding tax altogether. How are we to afford school fees, university fees, private health care and holidays in the sun whilst paying income tax?'
These progressive moves were welcomed by economic expert, Dominic Strathclyde-Ponsonby, who recalled how Gordon Brown had raised income tax for the poor from 10% to 20%. 'The City does not expect to be in the same bracket as poor people' he explained 'any reasonable person would appreciate the burden on the rich of having to pay huge amounts of tax through VAT. Everything should be done to help millionaires become billionaires and thus lead the country out of recession. True patriots hang onto their money.'