First Scottish embassy to be sited at Fishmongers Hall

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

image for First Scottish embassy to be sited at Fishmongers Hall
Alex Salmond official portrait

Edinburgh - Police are probing reports that some very fishy-sounding people have taken over the Scottish government and are preparing to open the country's first embassy in a souped-up former aquarium at London Bridge.

Fishmongers Hall is the SNP cabinet's preferred venue of choice amid claims that Robert the Bruce once had a whale of a time there cockling in the dubious company of London fishwives from nearby Billingsgate.

Today the Hall is in the ownership of a Worshipful livery company opposed to feckless Scottish turncoats' independence proposals.

Police sources indicate that suspicions focus on some pretty fishy-sounding names in the SNP cabinet headed by Alex Salmond and deputy Nicola Sturgeon.

Other fishy oddballs on the government front bench team include Shona 'Trout-Pout' Robison (Commonwealth Fly Phishing), Matthew Matheson Mullet (Minister for Fishwives and Dodgy Haircuts), John 'The Barracuda' Swinney (Secretary of State for Loan Sharks) and Fergus 'Squid-Face' Ewing (Loch Ness Affairs).

Michael Fish is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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