Timeless singing sensation Twiggy is furious with her ex-employer Marks & Spencer for reneging on her lifetime contract to appear in their Christmas advertising campaigns.
"I gave those tossers some of the best years of my life", said a tearful Twiggy outside her home in Fondlesham, Surrey. "...and who have they got in instead? That bunch of talent less no hopers from The X-Factor". She explained that every year she had looked forward to her invitations to the filming sessions and photo shoots and of course a big box of complementary knitted hats, big jumpers and sexy undies. But this year the invitations never came.
"I intend to drag them through every court in the land for what they have done." the singer added "And I'm not going to buy my pants there anymore either."
Shlomi Bernstein, head of marketing at M&S, confirmed that the company had made a strategic choice to appeal to a different demographic. He would not however confirm rumours that Frankie "Cokeupthenozza (Allegedly)" Cocozza would play a key role in the up coming launch of their new Speciality Range of class A drugs.
