Neil Aspin the next manager of England?

Funny story written by IainB

Thursday, 25 August 2011

image for Neil Aspin the next manager of England?
England job in safe hands?

In a pre-match interview with the Shaymen's website, manager of Conference North team Halifax Town, Neil Aspin, has admitted that he would leave Halifax Town at the drop of a hat should he be offered the England job.

With Fabio Capello due to step down as the England boss in the near future, it looks like Aspin would like to take the reigns solely for the financial gain.

"The England manager probably gets a hundred grand more a week than I do," he complained. "I think I'd prefer his job."

Neil Aspin certainly has the qualifications to manage at the highest level, having successfully got Halifax Town to the Champion's League title on Championship Manager, as well as steering his side to two successive promotions, just two more promotions back into the league. With his record, fans at the Shay are not to pleased with the news.

"I don't think he should even be considering leaving this early in the season," said Stanley Flatcap, life long supporter of both FC Halifax Town and their pre-liquidated version, Halifax Town FC. "He's doing a grand job, even if we've had a bad start this year."

It is speculated that should Aspin get the England manager's job, he would not have the favourites that all previous managers have had, trying to cram Gerrard and Lampard into the same team at the expense of any width.

"I reckon he'd be giving a start to some fresh faces," said Henry Whippet, another life long fan of the ex-League team. "I reckon Jamie Vardy could do a job on that there international stage. Given half a chance. Luton are after him you know. Could give us a hundred grand for him. Bonus."

Neil Aspin was unavailable for comment, either because he is locked in talks with the FA or because he wasn't contacted.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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