An unlikely character has announced his interest in buying the Magpies. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: Iran's charismatic president and self-confessed champion of the Geordies, is willing to add his financial and military might to help the boys back to their rightful place at the top of English football.
Mike Ashley (who admitted 'off record' to never having even heard of Iran) said 'it was a bloody good idea for an Arab'.
Long- time Newcastle fan, Eleventythree bellies Foster, said 'we have the right to develop like any other club and our relationship with the more extreme elements of the Islamic fundamentalism will only serve to make the opposition fair shite themselves.'
