Written by Collins_and_Dutton

Sunday, 25 January 2009

image for Benitez resigns from Liverpool FC to sell property

Liverpool FC manager Rafael "Rafa" Benítez, aged 48 resigned in a suprise announcement live on air today, following the second draw with local rivals Everton FC in the FA Cup.

Having announced the news with Sky Sports, Rafa explained that he had recently been in talks with the property company "Polaris World" and would be joining them on a permanent basis. Benitez went onto announce that he had recently taken control of six 3 bedroom properties each of which has a pool, and a "startling view of the local golf course". Live on air he then went on to sell one of the properties to presenter Richard Keys.

Benitez stated that the golf course had been designed by "my good, good, good, good, good, friend Jack the Nicklaus".

A number of rumours had been circulating for years about the football manager's ability to sell foreign property with an almost hypnotic control over potential customers once they look directly into his eyes. It is believed that Steven Gerrard unwittingly bought an entire complex of bungalows in Northern Spain in a deal which saw Benitez take a 18% cut.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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