Manchester United Trounced Again

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 30 August 2008

image for Manchester United Trounced Again
Rubbish: Zenit defenders surround Rooney

Manchester United continued with their poor start to the season in Monaco last night, when they were trounced by unfancied Zenit St Petersburg in the European Super Cup.

The Russians ran out 2-1 winners, and the scoreline was only made slightly less embarrassing when wantaway defender Nemanja Vidic scrambled home a consolation goal from a corner. No United forward has scored a goal this season.

The defeat was made worse when ginger midfielder Paul Scholes handled and was booked, when he put his hand up to ask the referee if he could go to the toilet. It was his second bookable offence, and he was shown red.

Manager Alex Ferguson told members of the Press:

"We were rubbish!"

United were completely off the pace throughout, and not one of their side could be said to have had a good game. Most worrying was the defence, and this showed when Danny - we don't know his second name - danced through the Reds' defence and finished with aplomb to make it 2-0.

United will try again today to secure the services of Dimitar Berbatov, but the Bulgarian is unlikely to have been impressed with this poor performance, and may choose to look further afield in his search for a new challenge at Bayern Munich.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot