Mar-a-Lago, Florida. In a phone call to the president of China this evening, Donald Trump demanded, as a condition for restarting trade talks that were to begin tomorrow, that China investigate the National Basketball Association's financial involvement in China. His order came after the NBA walked back a statement by a Houston Rocket official who praised Hong Kong's self-styled pro-democracy demonstrators.
"Their making billions in China," Trump said, referring to the NBA's TV rights and their numerous stores that sell NBA stuff. "They cowed to the commies when they saw the Rocket official's statement might cause the Chinese to drop TV basketball, replacing it with European soccer. Harry Maguire might be more popular there than LeBron James."
Rumor has it that Trump may appoint his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, to join the Chinese in investigating corruption involved with the NBA's dealings in China.