Brandon Bass: Neither Fish Nor Foul

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Tuesday, 22 May 2012

Rajon Rondo went Bass fishing in playoff Game 5 against the Sixers.

And, he caught a whopper.

For those who had been hoping and expecting a game to be won by those who are not necessarily going to the Hall of Fame, Brandon Bass provided the answer.

Many times over the past few games, the Boston Celtics, favored by most to win the series, seemed to look more rumpled than Mark Zuckerberg's wedding suit.

Brandon Bass suddenly showed up in his Sunday-Go-To-Meeting Outfit and sent the Sixers out on a fishing expedition.

In a playoff game of his career, the man who exchanged teams with Big Baby Davis during the off-season became the star of the day.

His point total was on the order of a machine, outscoring the entire Sixer team in the third quarter: 18 to 16. His overall total reached 27 points. This Bass had the Sixers on the hook.

Bass is a temperate species unlike the Big Baby fish whose crying jags often sent Kevin Garnett into a state of irritation. This Bass is not the large mouth variety we found in Mr. Davis.

Rondo, an aficionado of music, prefers harmony and rhythmic support. If ever he needed it to round out his continuing-to-escalate number of assists, he found the best music man in the Bass player.

Mr. Bass is the fifth chord on the Celtics starting lineup, and now his music has reached a crescendo. It could not have come a moment too soon.

The coda is on the horizon, and Bass may be needed one more time in Philadelphia to show up the 76er trombones and lead the Celtics to the big parade.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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