Dalglish And Wenger To Star In 'Visit Britain' Ads

Funny story written by Simon Saunders

Thursday, 3 May 2012

image for Dalglish And Wenger To Star In 'Visit Britain' Ads
One of the fetching outfits Arsene Wenger is seen wearing in the commercials

Two of the English Premier League's best known managers have been recruited to front a new advertising drive designed to encourage Brits to holiday at home.

Liverpool boss Kenny Dalglish and his Arsenal counterpart Arsene Wenger joined forces to front the series of commercials last month. The first advert will be premiered during the FA Cup final on Saturday.

We have had a sneak preview of the first advert. In it, Dalglish approaches what appears to be a middle aged woman but is really Wenger in drag wearing a floral dress and a hat at a jaunty angle. Dalglish asks the "lady" if she's ever seen the Palace of Westminster. The "lady" (Wenger) replies, "No, I haven't seen it." Dalglish then turns to the camera with a look of disbelief on his face and exclaims, "I can't believe she's not seen it!"

Four different commercials have been shot with Wenger dressed in various ladies outfits including a particularly delightful skinny jeans/boob tube combo and also a Union Jack dress just like the one Geri "Ginger Spice" Halliwell wore.

The tag-line, "I can't believe she's not seen it", is a cheeky reference to Wenger and Dalglish's shared inability to see any offences their own players have committed and shows that they are both prepared to poke fun at themselves.

Spokesman, Frank Lee-Scilly, said that they were delighted to have recruited the two managers and believe that the hilarious (?) commercials will be a shot in the arm for the British tourist industry.

Meanwhile, Glenn Hoddle's spokeswoman, Eileen Drewery, has denied reports that the former England boss and moral guidance councillor is to appear in fundraising adverts for Mencap, claiming that his beliefs would prevent him doing such a thing.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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