Written by IainB

Wednesday, 9 November 2011

image for German Speaking Sepp Blatter Backs Down Over Poppy Ruckus
Is this a German Army Knife? No! It isn't.

Sepp Blatter, the German speaking head of FIFA, originally stated that the England National football team could not wear poppies on their football kits during their international match on Saturday.

"This has nothing to do with Germany losing the war," said Blatter. "I am Swiss. Swiss I tell you. Why is it every time I side with the Fatherland the English accuse me of being partisan?"

According to Blather, poppies are a political symbol, and as such are against FIFA rules.

"It is the same reason why we do not allow flags on the kits," said Blaster.

Several high powered English people and Seb Coe, immediately headed off to FIFA headquarters, hidden in a leafy suburb of Berlin.

"We told them what for," said Coe. "We got them immediately to say that poppies could be worn on the armbands. But this wasn't good enough for us. No, we wanted our players to be able to wear poppy fancy dress costumes. We are demanding that our national team can come out to Dambusters. It is vital to our national team that they can all wear helmets, goggles and scarves with bits of wire in so it looks like their flying."

In order to get Seb Coe out of his office, Sepp Flatter has acceded to all English demands.

"To be honest," said Sepp Batter, "the England national team can all change their name to Poppy, sing 'two world wars, one world cup' and hang an effigy of Adolf Hitler from both goal posts. For the last bloody time: I am Swiss!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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