Occupy London
Unions say that public buildings should be occupied! Good idea let's give the staff their jobs back.
written by Backandtotheleft, 17 September 2012
"Fifty shades of grey" explodes sex shops sales
Sexshops around the world are generating millions of dollars extra on sales. 'All because of 50 shades of grey!' Said Big Z pimpin'.
written by Thomasj25, 17 September 2012
ZOMBIES
A zombie outbreak is reported within the areaaaaaaargh brraaaaaaaains bluuuuuurrgh
written by Thomasj25, 17 September 2012
Sir Salman Rushdie is the UK's new ambassador in Cairo!
In an attempt to calm the riots in Arabian countries David Cameron has announced that Sir Salman Rushdie is the new UK ambassador to Egypt; a brilliant diplomatic move to smooth over the fatwahs!
written by unknown
Ranulph Fiennes to embark on toughest expedition ever
The 68 year old explorer is going to attempt to locate Rupert Murdoch's heart. Speaking a press conference he said "Murdoch's arse is huge but many people think his heart is just a myth."
written by John_L, 17 September 2012
Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 133
"Please Don't Hurt Me"
by
I. Bruce Easily
by
I. Bruce Easily
written by IN SEINE, 17 September 2012
Joan Rivers to help Kate
After looking at the topless photos of Kate, Duchess of Cambridge surgery addicted QVC star Joan Rivers has offered to help Kate plan a breast augmentation.
written by John_L, 17 September 2012
French paparazzi defend taking Kate Topless Photos
The French have defended their photographers after the Kate Topless Photo scandal. "We're a republic, yes?" said photographer Piere Orthere. "We hate royals. Why do you think we killed Diana?"
written by IainB, 17 September 2012
Johnson recants his past words
"Okay, so I was wrong" declared the Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, after a number of critics pointed out the hypocrisy of his statements saying garbage collectors are incongruous with politics.
written by whatinthe world, 17 September 2012
Red Sox Officially Done for Season
David Ortiz thought the team was officially eliminated when he decided to take a powder in mid-July.
written by Ossurworld, 17 September 2012
World's deadliest snake found in Essex dockyard
The 45cm saw-scaled viper was discovered at Tilbury Port on Wednesday after stowing away on a boat in India.
"Yes, there's a few in Parliament as well!"
written by Inchcock, 17 September 2012
Giant Spanish slug arrives in salads to UK from Spain!
Giant Spanish slugs that invaded Britain are mating with native ones to create a mutant superslug capable of wreaking crop havoc.
"Ah... revenge for the Spanish armada at last eh?"
written by Inchcock, 17 September 2012
Stowaway snake attacks motor-biker doing 175mph!
Having sneaked out from behind the dashboard, the bad-tempered stowaway went straight for his driver's left hand.
It was no surprise that the incident caused him great distressssssssssssss!
written by Inchcock, 17 September 2012
M.O.D. gives key Falklands air contract to Portugal!
Phillip Hammond stripped UK firm Titan Airways of the contract to fly troops there and back. HiFly's winning bid was cheaper - by just a few thousand pounds a week.
"Why am I not surprised?!
written by Inchcock, 17 September 2012
Obama's New Foreign Policy Approach
President Obama calls for a conference with the leaders of the 20 Arab nations currently experiencing Muslim riots to all sit down together and sing cumbayah!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 September 2012
Law of Conservation of Political Crazies
For every Democratic left wing loony there is an equal and opposite Republican right wing loony! (UK citizens may substitute Liberals and Tories for Democratic and Republican, respectively.)
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 September 2012
Useless Nations Organization Speaks
LONE RANGER: UN human rights official warns Syrian opposition fighters they could be prosecuted for atrocities. TONTO: But, it's OK for Pres. Assad's military forces to kill 20,000 unarmed civilians!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 September 2012
Democratic Convention Speech
President Obama blamed former Republican President George W Bush for the Titanic disaster and took credit for increased US oil production initiated during the Bush Administration!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 September 2012
