This headline is a lie
A study has shown people are better at detecting liars than a lie detector. Actually, neither are good at spotting liars, but did you spot the lie?
written by IainB, 04 September 2011
German Banks Ink Deal with Transeuropa
The ferry to Belgium should be a lot safer, claims officials. German banks have already proved that they can float the entire country of Greece.
written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
Imogen Thomas bares all and a Welsh Wizard mourns!
Imogen Thomas has done a topless shoot and when asked what he thought about it a certain Welsh Wizard said; "I've seen it all before Boyo and they were quite a handful!" He's a much better dribbler!
written by unknown
Try Uniform Gay Dating!
"We had a great time!" cries Tittie from Loughborough. "I dated the Laughing Etruscan Warrior Costume correctly and won an Etruscan Mother & Child statuette. It's just a replica, but we had a great time!"
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Gingham Is "The New Corduroy", Claims Greek Orthodox Bishop
Martin Cholera, an Ipswich egg sizer, is building a scale model of the Lighthouse Of Alexandria out of discarded toblerone packages. "I love toblerone and I am obsessed with the Pharos of Alexandria", he screamed.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Towcester Celebrates Roman History
The Roman Milking Parlour exhibition at Sponne School runs until December, and, among other questions, it answers the age-old query: "did the Romans have Milkmaids?" See the Roman Milkmaid's Leather Pail and decide for yourself!
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
More Towcester News
Towcester was not called Lactodurum for nothing, as the Roman Milking Parlour exhibition at Sponne School proves. Here, until December, you can see an original Roman Milkman's Leather Apron and Hat
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
It's All Happening In Towcester
Visit the Roman Milking Parlour exhibition at Sponne School. It runs until December. See the Roman Leather Milking Machines and the Roman Leather Milk Churns and the Roman Leather Butter Knife. We are joking about the knife.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Caterwauling Banned In Philadelphia
Napoleon Blownapart!
Regency human cannonball Horace Crumpole was killed yesterday, . Crumpole, who dressed as Napoleon Bonaparte, died when his tricorn hat got wedged in the cannon, causing a fatal explosion.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Sales of Powdered Jedward Drinks Plummet
Napoleon kept an imaginary shoal of trout in his greatcoat, which he was forever tickling. Alexander The Great had an imaginary mandrill named Nibbles in a Greek Urn.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Ways To Eradicate Jedward
Why not pour boiling oil on them while they are doing their hair? Firing them out of a cannon would be good, so long as you pointed it out over the Irish Sea.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Mrs Thatcher "Obsessed With Omelettes", Claims Norfolk Idiot
There is no getting away from it. It's time to cull your Barbershop Quartet. I use cluster bombs. These are great if you're culling on a budget. Money no object? Try a helicopter gunship.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Never Offer A Wombat Mashed Potato
Sidney Yardbrushe, the much-missed travel writer, bequeathed such titles as: Explore Scunthorpe By Rickshaw, Halifax and Todmorden On A Budget, and Across Wolverhampton In A Bullock-Cart.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
Naked Rambler Attacked By Giant Panda
Piscean mole-catchers can expect a visit from an Etruscan Nelson impersonator who will bore them with tales of the Battle of the Nile and show slides of the Chimera of Arezzo.
written by Erskin Quint, 04 September 2011
9/11 "could happen again"
Time scientists have suggested that America could be facing another 9/11! It is estimated that it could happen as soon as this month, just after the 10th of September.
written by MonkeyInTheBath, 04 September 2011
Gaddafi to be announced as UN Goodwill Ambassador!
The UN have offered Gaddafi an escape route, if they find him. He will become a UN Goodwill Ambassador and his first role will be visiting European states who supported him all of those years and BP!
written by unknown
New Caledonian Cannibals Eat Clown
Cannibals ate a clown vacationing in New Caledonia. Officials learned of the incident when the cannibals got worried and went to a local clinic, claiming that the clown "tasted funny"
written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
Talking Goldfish a Hoax
Investigations into claims of a talking goldfish in Topeka Kansas uncovered a hoax. Upon investigation the goldfish proved to be completely mute. The voice was in fact coming from the snail.
written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
Vice-President Joe Biden Wants To Visit China Again (And Real Soon!)
Vice-President Joe Biden says he really enjoyed his trip to China and said he came back with some really neat souvenirs; some Chinese checkers, a Chinese fire drill, and $67 million in cash [U.S.].
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
The Reason Why Dick Cheney's Book Is Being Recalled
The publishers of Dick Cheney's latest book, in the interest of selling more books, are recalling every edition and are going to reissue it but without the words and as a coloring book.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
The Mayor Will Not Get Caught "Wet" Handed
New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg says that Hurricane Irene was a wake up call in regards to flooding. He has gone into eBay and purchased 18 used gondolas from Venice, Italy.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
Donald Trump's Secret Fetish Is To Work For The IRS
Donald Trump says he now wants to see President Obama's uncle's birth certificate, driver's license, and at least two valid credit cards.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
Condoleezza Rice Didn't Even Have His Email Address
Condoleezza Rice stated that she has no effen idea how Colonel Moammar Gadhafi ended up with 7,993 photographs of her in various stages of political correctness.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
Dick Cheney's Book Is Already Bound For The Silver Screen
The Sieg Heil Motion Picture Company of Germany is considering turning Dick Cheney's book into a movie. The working title is Lies! Lies! and More Freakin Lies!
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
New York City Will Be Prepared To Deal With The Flood Waters Next Time
New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg said that Irene and her excessive flooding was a wake up call and that he has gone into eBay and purchased 18 used gondolas from Venice, Italy.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 September 2011
