Sarah Palin's husband gets new car for her
Pretty good swap we think.
written by churchmouse, 27 September 2010
Serenity Prayer Revised for Modern Times
God grant me the serenity to accept nothing
The courage to complain about everything
And the wisdom to know that I am always right.
written by kslaught, 27 September 2010
Britain is turning into a "hot and spicy" Sodom and Gomorrah!
Dull Tomato ketchup, Daddies sauce, Colemans Pickles are out, Britain is hotting up and buying tons of peppery, hot chilli sauces following their heroes who love hot and spicy affairs, thanks Becks!
written by unknown
Blair Blesses Ed Milliband
The Labour Party Conference was transfixed as Tony Blair flew in giving Ed Milliband his blessing. Prince Charles declared: 'Well done Spike. The Milligans must be proud of you. In brotherly love'
written by j.w., 27 September 2010
Ex-French female minister mixes up fellatio with inflation, but admits loving it orally!
French ex-minister Md.Dati has "cocked" it up completely, she mixed up inflation with fellatio but admitted: "Inflated fellatio is tres bien, but it must be tres grande non petit!"
written by unknown
French MP Rachida Dati opens her mouth and puts something in it.
She misunderstands an interview question and ends up discussing fellatio instead of inflation.
written by Thibarine, 27 September 2010
Celebituaries: Jimi Heselden - Segway to Heaven
Segway inventor Jimi Heselden drives off cliff to death. You couldn't make it up. And neither could he. Suggestions for funeral music haven't gone much further than "Turn! Turn! Turn!" by The Byrds.
written by neilwatson, 27 September 2010
Christine O'Donnell Given the Definition of Masturbation, and Admits She Likes to Do That.
Christine O'Donnell now knows the meaning of masturbation and admits she likes to do that. I thought it had something to do with witchcraft.
written by UWGB-Beek, 27 September 2010
X-Factor's Louis Walsh upset because Dannii is doing the boys.
I'm not used to handling anyone over 25, he moans after being asked to mentor the seniors.
written by Thibarine, 27 September 2010
Li-Lo Lies Low On Lilo
Star is said to be all at sea after fresh drug allegations.
written by Nick Hobbs, 27 September 2010
Bruce Forsythes Wig Sells For 50 Pence At Auction.
Buyer says 'it was a small price toupée'.
written by Nick Hobbs, 27 September 2010
Britain to send prisoners into space
New colony on Mars will be dubbed 'Marstralia'. Officials say there is no correlation between this project and the country of Australia, where Britain sent their wrongdoers up until the late 1800s.
written by Lara Bruton, 27 September 2010
Commonwealth Games
Delays in making repairs to the hovels at the Athlete's village in Delhi for the Commonwealth games have been put down to the Contractors Hotline being a call centre in Swindon.
written by IainB, 27 September 2010
Oral Hygiene
The new electric toothbrush from ToothCare has an interchangeable head to allow the device to work as a vibrating sex toy bringing a new meaning to oral pleasure.
written by IainB, 27 September 2010
Cyrus gets "Big Break"
Teen "sensation" Miley Cyrus was recently rewarded for years of ruining kids imaginations with a Burger King commercial. Miley "gutted" she's an extra.
written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
Gordon Brown Stig Quote 3
Some people say that whenever he sees a pound coin on the street, he throws it down the drain to join the British treasury.
written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
BBC aren't making massive budget cuts...
They said this morning as they announced that Chris Moyles and Jonathan Ross had been replaced by two guys from university.
written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
