Carey Expecting Twins
Singer Mariah Carey and husband expecting her second set of twins!
written by Bureau, 16 December 2010
At Last! 3
You wont believe this, they've only gone and lost it! I will let you know.
written by armfeetandtoe, 16 December 2010
'Abominable Snowman' Files Unfair Discrimination Lawsuit
Yeti's Bhutan-based lawyer claims that label placed on client needlessly frightens public.
written by SpaceElevator, 16 December 2010
Contracts for losing X-Factor finalists
Simon Cowell has negotiated contracts with the X-Factor losing finalists. Wagner will be working at a supermarket, while Katy Waissel is to be a barrista at Caffe Zero.
written by IainB, 16 December 2010
At Last! 2
No, they have not found it. They thought they had, but it was a mistake. Now I'm annoyed.
written by armfeetandtoe, 16 December 2010
Ahmajinedad and Obama to do Xmas Puppet Show
Ahmajinedad & Obama are to do a Xmas puppet show of the seaside classic Punch & Judy, the pair were heard arguing over who was going to be Judy, they laughed in irony after saying "who needs enemys!"
written by Julian Shure, 16 December 2010
BP to be sued billions, while Cameron tries to save baby!
A fly on the wall in downing Street heard the PM saying to Mr Hague "This time its going to be cuts on the elderly I cant imagine them protesting can you babes?" Will smirked "You're a genius hun!"
written by Julian Shure, 16 December 2010
Stockholm Bomber Identified
Sweden's chief prosecutor Tomas Lindstrand said the homicide bomber had been "98% identified." He added that the situation remains serious, but the bomber was definitely "Achmed Klutz!"
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Why the USA Government has a $15 Trillion Debt
Dental activists ask the FDA to review scientific evidence that dental fillings containing mercury do not cause harm to patients. These are the same groups that worry about shark attacks in Kansas!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Reversal of Fortune
WABC's program "The View" has been cancelled. Doctors discovered that each of the the ladies cranial and rectal cavities have been transposed, but still are filled with the same substances!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
TV Makes Me Sick
San Francisco CA man sues TV lawyers, claiming all those specified diseases, bad drugs and faulty medical implants turned him into a hypochondriac!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
No Pork Here
The Omnibus Spending Bill has a provision that Americans who take home an endangered White Rhinoceros, Leopard, Giant Panda, Sumatran Tiger, Komodo Dragon, Wolf or Polar Bear will receive tax credits.
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
A Taxing Problem
Current US House Majority Leader Hoyer says Democrats will be proven right about opposing tax cuts. He then volunteered to double his income taxes and give his entire estate to the federal government!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
The Other Dream Action
House Speaker Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Reid are to be indicted by the US Department of Justice in January 2011 for supporting corrupt practices in passing unconstitutional Obamacare.
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Anyone Got a Cheeseburger?
Michelle Obama announced today that obese kids pose a threat to national security by not being able to serve in the armed forces. Anti-war groups threw tomatoes, broccoli and other fresh vegetables!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
On-Line Pharmacy
Have you been drinking the Obama/Pelosi/Reid Cool Aid? Call 1-800-TEA-PARTY or go to TEAPARTY.com to receive a free sample of the antidote, FISCAL RESPONSIBILITY!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Press Conferences Excluded
The "Minimum Essential Coverage Provision" of Obamacare is declared unconstitutional by a VA Federal Judge. President Obama asks former President Clinton to be the official Obamacare spokesperson!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Perception
President Obama is off on another Hawaii vacation over the Christmas holidays, while 9.8% of American workers are unemployed!
written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 December 2010
Ill Fated UK Sub Off (again) on Sea Trials!
New captain says grounding, collision, and breakdowns all in the past; looks forward to an adventuresome cruise to warmer weather in Bermuda Triangle.
RN now having trouble getting volunteers to go.
written by unknown
Putin Looks Younger, Has More Spring in his Step!
Russian insiders say it has to do with the 25 year old former gymnast
he's been rumored to be bouncing around with in bed. His absent wife is said to be recovering from 'radiation sickness."
written by unknown
Bad Week for Barrack!
After being shit on by Libs, Moderates, Republicans and Media, Barry finds Bo the White House Dog shit in his bed. No sympathy from Michelle who said," you made the damn thang, go lie in it fool!"
written by unknown
Obama Warms Up to Clinton; Asks Him to Spend the Night!
Bill declined after being told he couldn't bring a date, but would have to share.
Said Bill, " I may be considered the country's first black president, but bro, she's all yours I ain't that horny!
written by unknown
I'm Dreaming of a Wet, Muddy Field
New poll finds 98% of Britons agree this White Christmas thing is f*^@ing miserable.
written by Catherine the Average, 16 December 2010
