Running from a Tsunami? There's an app for that

Funny story written by IainB

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

image for Running from a Tsunami? There's an app for that
Am I high enough?

With tsunamis so much in the news, Apple have decided that now is the right time to release their eagerly awaited Tsunami App.

"Personally, living in the Peak District," said App Now! editor Buck Mackintosh, "I cannot see much use for this app right now. However, I can understand what a great stride forward this is in terms of personal safety for any iPhone user travelling in an area prone to tsunamis."

The app uses the GPS facility of the iPhone to pinpoint the user's location and height above sea-level. Should the user find themselves on a beach where the sea is retreating alarming they point the camera of the iPhone at the scene. The app uses dead reckoning and topographical knowledge to calculate the exact height the tsunami wave will reach upon hitting the shoreline. Using the mapping software, the app then displays the quickest route to a point of land high enough above sea level to allow the user to escape the tsunami.

"Additionally," said Mackintosh, "the app will video the whole thing so it can be sent to newscasters around the world at the touch of a button. It will alert emergency services as to the users location. One crucial feature this version is missing, but is promised in a later free upgrade, is the relatives contact function."

The app owner indicates a list of people that they would like to contact in the event that there are no suitable high places to get to in time and automatically connect the iPhone user to their nearest and dearest.

"I think it was omitted in the first version," said Mackintosh, "because it's a bit morbid."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more