Less dinosaurs than previously thought

Funny story written by IainB

Thursday, 21 October 2010

image for Less dinosaurs than previously thought
Is it a Tyrannosaurus or a malformed Pterosaurs?

At the last count, there were nearly seven hundred species of dinosaur. If one palaeontologist is right, however, there were a mere fifty or so.

"We have been looking at it all wrong," said Doctor Ivan Jaukiov from the Moscow Institute of Palaeontologist. "What we've been seeing as different dinosaurs are in fact the same dinosaurs at different stages."

Jaukiov points to an entire new genus of dinosaur built from just one specimen.

"This was just ridiculous," Jaukiov announced. "I took another look at this dinosaur. It's a straight stegosaurus with a birth defect. I cannot believe that my fellow palaeontologists have missed this."

That one case forced Jaukiov to re-examine the rest of the dinosaur lineage.

"I've been through all six hundred and eighty-four species," Jaukiov said. "Some look different in just a few cases, and I would say that these are juveniles and adults. Others, such as the various raptors are not even dinosaurs! There are no reptilian features in the raptors. This calls into question the whole dinosaurs evolving into birds theory."

MIT Head of Palaeontology, Brandon Hillson, disagrees strongly. "Jaukiov is a joke," Hillson said. "He's been trying to discredit the rest of the dinosaur world for years. I think it stems from the fact that his 'big discovery' had already been found, and the Linean Society took his classification away. It's a good job really because Jaukiovasaur is a really stupid name."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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