NIST relieved after 'missing link' found

Funny story written by Intrepid

Monday, 20 April 2009

The US National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) has expressed relief after a team of independent researchers found conclusive evidence of explosives (nano-thermite) in dust samples from the World Trade Centre collapses, as reported on TV2 NEWS in Denmark.

NIST spokeswoman, Penelope Prevaricator, issued the following statement:

"NIST was charged with the difficult task of having to explain the three WTC tower collapses based on fire and plane impacts alone. Our job was made easier by the almost complete lack of physical evidence at our disposal. But we still had to ignore the few steel samples in our possession. In the end, computer simulations saved the day. Although some noisy critics refused to just shut up and take our word for it, demanding that we test for evidence of explosives. The embarrassing truth is that we could not have tested for explosives even if we had been allowed to, as we simply had nothing to test.

"Thankfully, all this has changed since Dr. Niels Harrit from the University of Copenhagen and 8 other researchers confirmed the presence of nano-thermite in four dust samples taken from ground zero.

"Now we can all drop this charade and finally believe what our eyes have been telling us all along, that the towers exploded rather than collapsed. It is a huge relief for NIST staff, who have been under a lot of pressure. A virtual epidemic of cognitive dissonance had left several departments severely understaffed."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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