Washington AC/DC - (ET Mess): Alien Hunter Derrel Sims has emerged as Pentagon hacker Gary McKinnon's accomplice after declassified FBI files revealed today that Al Gore gagged US military research connecting UFO activity to the rise in global warming.
Sims, 69, has always claimed that Gore's sole raison d'etre as Clinton's Veep was to systematically eradicate all official files connecting greenhouse gases and UFO Helium-3 combustion byproduct emissions 'in order to protect the Pentagon's ambitions for Mars'.
Major international military organizations always thought both Sims and Gore were dangerious nutters, however, and amused themselves for decades by planting fake leads to preposterous 'top secret' UFO files.
A cunningly thought-out NATO military intelligence strategy circa 1996 planted a rigged mobile telephone into a London brothel patronised by ex-KGB spooks linked to the recent Polonium 210 death of Russian turncoat Alexander Litvinenko.
This ensured thieves fenced the offending handset to Opus Dei operatives in league with sinister gay paedo offshoot 'The Velvet Glove'.
Eventually some of the doctored mobile's dialled phone numbers found their way to Pentagon Hacker McKinnon whose US accomplice Sims had offered a massive $$$ bounty for proof of successful 'alien implant' surgery on alleged UFO abductees.
Operation Slug & Lettuce then took over reeling in various corrupt bastards who had lost money in an internet scam purporting to sell mining rights on the Moon.
Russian tycoon Boris Berezovsky is a top Al Qaeda ringleader.
