Cyberkinetics Wants to Make You a Millionaire

Written by Mr. Wizard

Monday, 23 July 2007

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Cyberkinetics: Making Waves in Your Brain

Cyberkinetics Brain Systems, Inc. recently announced two exciting events which has driven its stock price soaring.

Their groundbreaking BrainGrate Neural Interface System was named an "R&D 100" award winner by R&D Magazine, ranking it as one of the most innovative new products of the year. The R&D 100 awards honor excellence and innovation and are presented each year to 100 new products.

This device looks like something out of the movie The Matrix, as it actually couples a human brain to a computer interface to control objects with thoughts.

The company also recently announced that their Andreaâ„¢ Oscillating Field Stimulator (OFS) Device technology platform is on the fast track to being approved by the US FDA. This device is being developed to regenerate neural fibers that form functional connections that restore tactile sensation and movement for those with spinal cord injuries and, ultimately, a wide range of central nervous system injuries, diseases and conditions.

Stock prices were up over 60% on the news to 0.62 per share with a target price of over $1.00. A company representative who spoke with under the condition of anonymity and who would identify himself only as "... the president and CEO of the company," proudly proclaimed that with a nominal investment of $750,000 (US) a person could become a millionaire in less than 12 months.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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