Solar system - (Rotters): The first overwheming proof that the Cosmos has registered its dismay at Earth's global crisis has appeared in a bizarre weather pattern photographed around the ringed planet Saturn, where the Hubble telescope has spotted a huge five-sided feature circling the north pole.
"This is a sign from the Goddess", said a spokesman at the Whole Earth observatory in Pangaea, California.
"The five-sided structure is a sigil of Isis who is clearly pretty damned pissed off with the satanist Pentagon policies responsible for the ungodly mess on Earth."
Meanwhile NASA astronomers are stunned that this weather fixture displays "a precise geometric fashion with five nearly equally straight sides," according to the Cassini probe team commentator at NASA's Jet Revulsion Laboratory.
"The last time we saw anything remotely like it was when a child molestor ring in the Pentagon was smashed by the Feds after Nancy Reagan's astrologer tested positive for opiates.
"At that time the atmosphere around our own planet was pretty dense. Whole areas of the northern hemisphere were obfuscated by a thick cloud. But this Saturn emanation has us gob-smacked."
The pentagonal shape is nearly 15,000 miles across and displays all the cover-up signs of a 9/11 aircraft smash into one of its sides.
Astrophysicists have also noted that at Saturn's south pole the telescope also spotted a "freaky eyelike feature" that is a dead ringer for the London Eye tourist attraction erected to mark the Millenium.
According to CIA classified files, a Pentagon mole has long been suspected as a key accomplice to Taleban smack dealers hired to stage the 9/11 atrocity.
"We're watching this one 24/7," said the NASA team man. "It's only a matter of days now. Truss me on this."
Donald Rumsfeldt is under sedation.
