The Turing Test is a test to see if a computer has reached the required level of sophistication to fool a panel of judges that they are talking to a human, instead of a computer. No computer programme has yet managed to convince a quorum of judges that they are human, though many have come close.
However, in a recent Turing Test, the judges were given four so-called ChatBots - computer programmes that are designed to have personalities and engage with humans - and six call centre operatives from a variety of companies, including two banks, an IT helpline, two double glazing firms and a personal injuries lawyer.
"It was very hard to tell them apart," said Michael Carmichael, one of the judges. "We marked them all down as a computers, which was obviously nonsense."
Judges attempt to discuss various topics with the computers and humans, such as the weather, where they like to go on holiday or the best way to make a soufflé.
"At least the ChatBots gave it a go," said Carmichael. "When I was talking to one of the humans, he kept ignoring what I'd said about the South of France to tell me about trips, slips and falls at work. Completely unbelievable. He was at the stage ChatBots were at fifteen years ago!"
Whilst news that they were less human than computer programmes that would fit on a flash drive was rather disturbing to call centre operators, news that ChatBots are fifteen years more advanced than the people working in call centres has bosses of these industries rubbing their hands in glee.
"I'm investigating replacing my two hundred operatives with one computer programme that runs on my mobile phone," said Jeremy Bellamy, owner of Britain's largest call centre operation in Gainsborough, serving most of the call centre industries from selling to IT Helplines.
"Currently, I've got this high rate of suicide from people who can't take the constant rejection," he said. "Computers don't give a damn. Obviously, I'm not going to make anybody redundant, it'll take too long, I'll just wait for the last of them to peg it, and plug in my new ChatBot."
AI Computer Scientists at UMIST in Manchester were rather surprised to discover that artificial intelligence may emerge from call centres rather than university computer labs.
"When I rang up to find out more," said Professor Degressor, head of applied AI research at UMIST, "The chap on the other end of the phone was more interested in telling me what was on at the cinema! Most disconcerting."
