Pornographers Still Using WindowBlinds

Written by Adam Click

Saturday, 5 April 2014


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WindowScreens, the latest product from Microsoft, is underutilized by porn makers who still prefer Windowblinds.

A study by the Bureau of Pornographic Affairs, a agency of the United States Secret Service-with an accent on "Vice"-has come to the conclusion that the majority of pornographers operating within the United States are still using WindowBlinds some five years after that products introduction, despite the fact that better options now exist.

The study highlights the difficulties involved in getting the secretive porn industry to try new technology despite ease of use and superior features compared to products porn producers currently have at their disposal.The inability to embrace change is among the top complaints those who use porn have with the porn industry itself.

The study found that among the barriers to the adoption of new technology was the fact that most pornographers are middle aged men in trench coats who are looking to turn a quick profit on their perversions. Another problem is a lack of awareness of new products which would make production of porn videos both easier and faster.

Finally, the study concludes that there is a certain perceived quality to the videos produced with older technologies. Joey "The Fish" Sapone, president of Middle Aged Perverts or MAP, an association of pornographers and sex industry strategists, put it most concisely when he said, "That old fashioned, grainy video is just a real turn on. You know?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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