Written by Unassociated Press

Tuesday, 18 October 2011

image for Scientist Claim 'Bieber Fever' As Strange STD

Many believe the explosion of popularity for Canadian pop star Justin Bieber as nothing more than a fad. Teen girls often flock from everywhere to buy his albums, to get his concert tickets or to see him live.

However, scientist at the University of Retsacnal have a different explanation. After hours of careful research, they've determined that 'Bieber Fever' (as it's became known), is actually an STD contracted through the air.

"A parasitic micro-organism travels through the airwaves from their speakers or during his concert and colonizes in the teenager's vaginal region.", claims Dr. Ganji Supta, lead scientist at Retsacnal.

Scientist admit this only occurs on rare occasions. The first known case was in 1964, during the "British Invasion" of The Beatles, and Other instances occurred with the bands Insync, and The New Kids On The Block. There was a small outbreak of venereal disease (VD) with Justin Timberlake's music, but that stopped abruptly once he made the transition into movies.

Out of the 500 girls that participated in the study, 390 of them actually contracted the illness. The participants were exposed to 120 hours of Bieber's music played on a continuous loop. In severe cases, some of the girls developed blood shot eyes, foaming of the mouth and even "exorcist" like symptoms.

"One girl's head actually spun all the way around." claims Supta.

The cause of the STD is yet to be determined, but scientists say it is directly linked to a genetic chromosome only found in families of teen pop stars. Retsacnal also claims that Canadian singers are more susceptible due to their exposure of cold climates.

"Both doctors and researchers are working on a cure for this disease," says Supta, "but it's going to take time."

Unfortunately, time is not their side. A hospital in Wilmington, Delaware recently reported more than a hundred cases of girls with 'Bieber Fever' in the course of a month.

"The so-called 'Bieber Fever' mixed with the teen's menstrual cycle is a dangerous combination.", claims the head of Pediatrics at Wilmington Memorial Hospital, Dr. Jim Swartz. Swartz, among others, seem sceptical that there's a cure for the disease.

Researchers, scientists and doctors are collaborating in effort of discovering a cure for this unusual STD. They're uncertain as to when they'll have it, but are hopeful for sometime between now and the year 2015.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Justin Bieber, Pop

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