A rare species of jackal has been spotted at Democratic headquarters in Hippytown, Oregon.
It has been feasting on the old and wounded and frail, taking senators and congressmen and congresswomen out of politics, dragging them into their jackal dens, and converting them to rightist doctrine created by QANON “professors”.
The jackal has beady red eyes and long yellow fangs, and may be armed with the 2nd Amendment and an AR-15. It may be wearing a red baseball cap, one of the worst forms of headgear, barely keeps the sun out of your eyes, and it’s just too stiff. Like the jackal!
If you see it, do not approach, but contact your nearest drum circle. Do not listen to anything it has to say, even when it says “Oh, you’ll listen to them – but you refuse to listen to our side of the story!” Do not look directly at it or you may begin thinking, “You know, they DO have some good ideas.”
And remember: where there’s one jackal, there will likely be more. They travel in packs, hunting … hungry … possibly rabid … and very very smelly when they walk away and lift their tails.
You’ve been warned!
