A Limerick For The Ages

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 3 April 2020

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BILLINGSGATE POST: To call this just another limerick would be akin to calling World War II just another war, Secretariat just another horse, or the Hope Diamond just another rock. To celebrate the publishing of this new and never-before-seen limerick, Dr. Billingsgate traveled to the birthplace of this form of poetry, Limerick, in Ireland.

Inspired by the whimsical Irish leprechauns who frequent the pubs, and who drink copious amounts of Irish whiskey while mumbling umbrageous limericks of their own, I finally conquered this form of poetry with the following masterpiece. Blending a desultory attempt to link classic iambic pentameter with the aabba rhyming scheme, the final result is nothing less than stunning:

If Kaczynski had felt somewhat better
He wouldn’t have put bombs in his letters
He’d have sent a cab for Lewinsky
And scored a quick Blowinsky
Followed by a cigar and phone sex chatter

Slim: “He puts Shakespeare to shame.”

Dirty: “Yo, Dude. At the very least, ranks up there with John Keats and Lord Byron.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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