A segment of the Chris Matthews Show We Didn't Watch

Funny story written by patrick oliver griswold

Monday, 24 October 2011

Matthews: When I think of Chris Christie entering the race I see a big fat hater hating so hatefully I really hate to hear how much hate these conservative haters hate. So hateful.

Garafolo: Actually, all these Tea Baggers are really are a bunch of stupid racist haters. They are so full of hateful s**t they make me puke. I think they suffer from Racist Hate Syndrome. I mean, Christie is so fat, how does he fit on the toilet seat. He's a big fat racist hater. He's so full of s**t he probably spends eight hours a day hating on the toilet. He's a hater. A racist and a hater. Such a big fat racist hater.

Matthews: Exactly. Hateful hating hatemonger. The Tea Party is full of hateful hating hatemongering racists. They have hate fests and should be stopped. There's just too much hate coming out of the hateful hating Tea Party. They should change their name to Hating Hateful Haters full of Hate Hate Party. The Hate Bags.

Garafalo: And don't get me started with that hateful hating bitch Bachman. I think her hateful religious husband needs to come out of the closet. Such a hater.

Liberal Gay activist: Wait girlfriend. Don't YOU get me started. I would show those hateful hating racists something they would get really hateful about. They'd hate to be outed out of the hate closet. Serves these hating haters right. I hate 'em. Bunch of hateful homophobic hate mongers.

Bill Maher: They're beyond hate. They are the hatingest hate-filled ultra-hate hatestremists. And they are so stupid. Tell me, did any of the hating tea baggers make it past tenth grade. I don't think so. They are ugly and stupid. They're just a bunch of hateful@#*&^%$@@#*& ^%$@$^!@ @$#^(**)* &%*&^^$#%$%^^*&&*(****(*&*&^'s…

Matthews: How did these white racist Islamophobic haters get so angry? I mean it really makes me mad that they can be so hate-filled and angry! I for one HATE them!! They demean and call liberals names, and I mean really bad names, like "lefty's"…So crude and hateful. Yes, they are a bunch of uneducated filthy race-baiting animals. Most of them should have been retroactively aborted!

And that is the show for today, ladies and gentleman. Watch tomorrow when my guests will be the Reverend Al Sharpton, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee, and Louis Farrakhan. Our topic: Racism in the Tea Buggers Party. Why do they hate?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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