Written by rfreed

Friday, 29 July 2011

image for Ann Coulter's Torrid Love Letter To Norway's Mass Murderer Breivik- "I Love Your Aryan Attitude!"
The Aryan Ideal

The ever intrepid Wonki Leaks has scored another scoop with a revealing email sent by the acid blooded extreme American right winger Ann Coulter to the Norwegian mass murderer Anders Breivik.

Hacked from Breivik's email account by Rupert Murdoch himself, then rehacked from Murdoch by fellow Australian Julian Assange personally, the tidbit became an instant internet smash when released.

The email then was re-rehacked by the crack email hacker team here at The Spoof, all hired from the now defunct British tabloid News Of The World.

The email, a proposition of love from Ms. Coulter to the handsome and deadly rightist Breivik, gives an insight in the working of the mind of the beloved (and beloathed) blond Republican literary diva. Here is the text in full:

Hello Handsome!

Sorry to hear of your tragic incarceration. Those devious liberals probably got you arrested on a concealed weapons charge. They don't seem to change their tactics much from country to county. They should be exterminated. Too bad gas showers aren't allowed any more! The libtards are probably the ones behind that government restriction too. They just won't let a worthwhile enterprise thrive!

You certainly have done your part. Imagine! Getting rid of over 90 liberals at one time! Impressive! And all by yourself with just a couple of handguns and some fertilizer. I would nominate you for the NRA poster boy of the year except you are from Norway and not the U.S. (Don't get me wrong, big boy, Norway is almost as good as America.) And then bombing the floor out from under those in the parliament! You are a real hunk of He-man! Not only do you get rid of the Social rats, but also the nest they sit in! Brilliant!

I know you might not be available much, but if you should ever get free for a couple nights (I know those lame European left wing laws might let you get out on the streets for a bit of fresh air. If they are stupid enough to make them, take advantage of them I always say!) I would like to hook up with you.

I really go for the blond, strong jawed, blue eyed Aryan types, especially if those eyes are as cold as ice. Having a hunk's body helps too. At least in solitary in prison you'll have plenty of time to keep your physique up. Even if you do get the maximum Norwegian term for murder of 21 years, I'll be waiting for you. A Fuhrer such as yourself only comes along once in a generation and the last one shot himself in a bunker in Berlin in 1945.

In case you don't recognize me from my books or FOX News, I am a slender WASP ( very!) with blond hair and blue eyes (also very Aryan! We'd be such a perfect match!) I am a dedicated anti liberal and like to wear black miniskirts (just for you I will 'forget' to put on underwear with it!) I have an enticing slim figure; some say 'skeletal' or 'Allie McBealish' (who was a libtard lawyer on a lefty-lame TV show. These people I sic my doberman on.) I know how to charm a muscle man like yourself. I have a sexy swastika laced nightgown that I wear only for special men. We can have a romantic evening together, cuddling and watching reruns of 24 Hours or the Nuremburg Rallies, then sip wine, snack on gjetost and sauerkraut before stripping down and making Aryan babies. It would be so romantic! At the point of orgasm we would shriek Heil, Heil, Heil in unison!

Let me know your answer quickly love. I await in impassioned heat!

Just one request, my love. When you do get free, could you give up the organic farming business? It just seems so, so, so Leftist! Yuck!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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