Hose of Representatives Typo Shuts Down Congress!

Written by b kenneth mcgee

Monday, 11 April 2011

As talking heads pondered and the print media wondered, the legislation approving the budget was once more put in limbo yesterday. The reason was a typo by the Congressional printing office and no one knows if it was deliberate or accidental. The Republican caucus is not amused as all the documents for the legislation contained the words U.S. Hose of Representatives and not the U.S. House of Representatives. The legislation was immediately put on hold.

Speaker of the House, John Boehner called a press conference this morning in order to dispel the rumors that were flying around the U.S. Capitol. Slightly red of face, Speaker Boehner spoke: "We have no reason to believe this was anything but a human mistake. These things happen and it is more than unfortunate that it has held up legislation that would have kept our government from closing down. We will move quickly to correct it, any questions?" A snickering press corps was quick to respond.

"Mr. Speaker,"said a journalist from the NY Times. "Does this mean that this hose is not a home?" Boehner's face grew redder.

"Mr. Speaker," said a reporter from the New Republic, "Are you saying that there is no place like hose?" Boehner's mouth was set with a grim look.

A reporter from MSNBC, not known to be friendly to Boehner and the Republican caucus, asked,"Mr. Speaker, you are from the Midwest. Do you think the printing office was thinking about, A Little Hose on the Prairie when they made the mistake?"

"This is NOT funny," screamed Boehner.

"Then, up your nose with a rubber house," yelled a voice from the back of the room as the hall emptied.

Last seen, Speaker Boehner's face was contorted, tears were streaming from his eyes, he had assumed a fetal position on the floor behind the lectern and aides were rushing to his side.

A few of the cruelest of the press corps joined arms and started to sing as they left the hall, "Over the river and through the woods, to grandmother's hose we go!"

In related news, Congressman Boehner's office has issued a statement saying the Speaker had entered Bethesda Naval Hospital for an ailment, yet to be determined.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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