In Memory of Gary Coleman: Stupid Sh*t Tweeted by Celebs

Funny story written by anthonyrosania

Sunday, 30 May 2010

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Gary Coleman and Shannon Price, in happier, more not-dead times.

Celebrities who wouldn't have taken Gary Coleman's call a week ago say stupid s--t via Twitter.

Charlotte Rae, Mrs. Garrett on Diff'rent Strokes: "Gary was so loving, so charming … He was the big star of the show. He was the reason the show was a hit."

Steve Gabriel, producer of Avenue Q, a Broadway Musical puppet show that spoofs Gary Coleman: "On behalf of the Avenue Q family, we feel this is a great loss. In a way, we are with Gary Coleman everyday. His character on stage is humorous, but it also reflects great compassion and respects his place in the industry. In a small way, Gary is going to live on with the show." (In a small way. Oh, I get it!!! Gary Coleman was small. HA!)

Traci Bingham, useless lump of formerly-hot flesh: "The sudden passing of Gary Coleman comes to a great shock. I was fortunate to have the honorable pleasure to work with him... He always had such a positive outlook on life and people! Gary will truly be missed by the world and he will forever live on in my heart!!"

Dana Plato, Kimberly on Diff'rent Strokes: "{Sound of decomposition.]"

Ron Carlson, Director of "Midgets Vs. Mascots: "He had a good heart. Underneath the exterior was a goodhearted guy."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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