If you can get ahead
when all about you are losing
and blaming it on you
If you can trust yourself
when all men doubt you
but make no allowance for their doubting
If you can’t wait to bomb
or get tired of waiting to bomb
or lie and deal in lies
or hate liberals and give way to hating
and yet don’t look too good
or talk too wise
If you can dream of power
and make those dreams your master
If you can’t think nor make thoughts your aim
If you can’t bear to hear the truth spoken
unless twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools
or watch men give their lives for things you’ve broken
If you can make a heap of all your winnings
and risk it all on one speech at the U.N.
and lose, and blame everyone else for the loss
If you can force your housekeeper to get you drugs
or fondle women and still win California
leak treasonous secrets or make sweetheart deals
with your old companies
If you can lie to crowds and sound virtuous
or offend heads of state with your common touch
if neither foes nor friends can trust you
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
with sixty seconds of spin
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it
and which is more
You’ll be a Republican my son
