Jennifer Lopez AKA J.Lo Says She Hates Being A Sex Object

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 22 August 2011


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Jennifer has stated that she is a very good seamstress. (Photo courtesy of Ryan Seacrest).

NEW YORK CITY - The woman who People Magazine named The Most Beautiful Woman In The World says that she is not feeling like her title too much at the moment.

Jennifer Lopez says that the Marc Anthony divorce proceedings are starting to take a toll on her emotionally, physically, mentally, geographically, and politically.

She recently spoke with Tapioca Swizzle of Tittle Tattle Tonight and confided to her that all of the worry and stress has caused her to develop hive-like blemishes on her face, neck, breasts, stomach, and groin region.

J.Lo even noted that she had her maid take a photo of her humongous badonkadonk (ass) and show it to her. And just as she suspected some of the hive-like blemishes are even appearing on her expansive booty.

When Swizzle asked J.Lo if she was seeing P Diddy as had been reported in a supermarket tabloid, Lopez became quite upset.

She remarked that although she knows that P Diddy has told her hundreds of times that she is the sexiest woman on the face of the earth she is just not interested in getting back together with him due to the fact that his snoring is up in the 90 plus decibel range.

J.Lo added that she hates being considered a sex object and wants men to start looking at her for the wonderfully intelligent female she is. She doesn't want to be known as just a woman who happens to have the most perfect tata's, butt, legs, and (blank) in the country.

She pointed out that she is also a damn good cook, a great seamstress, and a fabulous pinochle player.

In The Where Are They Now Department. Former actor Joaquin Phoenix who made a complete ass of himself on the David Letterman show on Feb. 11, 2009, is reportedly working as an assistant manager at a Pizza Gal Restaurant in Hacienda Heights, California.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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