Brits Viewing Figures Slump

Funny story written by grimbo

Thursday, 17 February 2011

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Fewer than 5 million viewers tuned in to watch the Brits Awards on February 15th.

The event, which was staged for the first time ever at the 02 Arena in London, suffered its worst viewing figures for 5 years. ITV's coverage was beaten by "Jeremy Clarkson Talks About Cheese" and the breakthrough Channel 4 documentary "5 Minutes Looking At A Wall".

But the answer is not hard to find - people are simply fed up seeing or listening to people with abbreviations in their name.

Plan B, Cee Lo Green, Jessie J, Wretch 32 Feat L (even the abbreviation for "Featuring" is irritating), Katy B, The xx.......

The list is endless.

Research suggests that there is a genuine groundswell of opinion against the increasing abbreviationisation of our lives.

Emotions are running so high that there may well be a popular revolution incited by the educated classes who are despairing at the constant attacks on the English language.

You heard it here first.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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