Spencer Pratt: Voted 2010 Pointless Man of the Year

Written by P.M. Wortham

Friday, 17 December 2010

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Spencer Pratt: Pointless Man of the Year, 2010

Though competition was stiff for the honor of being voted CQ Magazine's "Pointless Man of the Year", the winner with more than 65% of the voting was the forgettable and regrettable, Spencer Pratt.

Claim to fame being nothing more than existing as that short, obnoxious, self absorbed husband to Heidi Montag, you know, the vapid blonde who burned through her 15 minutes of fame on a cancelled reality TV show, only to be thrust back in the spotlight for another 10 minutes thanks to about 90 plastic surgeries? Yeah, that one. The couple who surpassed the Lohan parents with traits of despicability so dire, they would do anything to get themselves featured on the next episode of TMZ.

Beating out other frontrunners for the award like Mel Gibson, Danny Bonaduce, and the "I'm going to make the forehead bandanna a fashion statement" Brett Michael, Pratt beat all comers this year because of his vast catalog of bad behavior in just about every news video clip, or interview, or through his mere existence in public.

The voting categories including ratings in a range from; "Barely Bearable" to "Please God, Move to Uzbekistan". Spencer received 127,588 votes, 83 thousand of which politely asked him to pack his bags. We look forward to buying carpet (or tile, or insurance, or auto parts) from Spencer soon.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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