BEVERLY HILLS - Sultry actress Salma Hayek was sunbathing beside her luxurious $7.9 million mansion named Casa Las Maracas talking openly with her gardener Paquito Pistachio.
Hayek, who has been named as one the world's most attractive women, told Pistachio that she is very lucky to have been blessed with a gorgeously sensuous body which includes a pair of fantastic tata's, long, lovely slender legs, and a badonkadonk (booty) that has been called one of Tinsel Town's finest.
Pistachio confided to Miss Hayek that back in March of 2010, he had climbed over the 25 foot border fence in Nogales, Arizona and immediately went to work as a security guard at a local Taco Bell.
He was quick to point out that with the help of the restaurant manager Corsicana Blitzenberger, 37, he was able to acquire the needed documentation to become a naturalized citizen in just seven short lessons.
Hayek smiled and told Pistachio that she herself had once been an illegal alien back in 1991. She told him that she had left her home in Coatzacoalcos [pronounced COR-Du-Roy] Vera Cruz, Mexico and headed north towards Texas.
She pointed out that she had no immigration papers, legal documents, or even a lottery ticket. She crossed the Rio Grande at Laredo and took a Greyhound bus to California.
She arrived in Los Angeles and within three hours she found a job making hamburgers at Hank's Hippity Hoppity Hamburger Haven in East Los Angeles.
It was there that she was discovered by famed motion picture producer Sheboygan Saddlewood. He gave her a combination screen test - citizenship test, which she aced.
Hayek was signed on the spot to appear in his drug cartel-spy epic, The Definitively Desperate Desperado Denizens of Rancho Cucamonga.
After that she appeared in the two follow up sequels, The Desperate Desperado's Disrupt Disneyland and The Desperate Desperado's Haul Ass To Detroit.
Salma Hayek was recently named by Rolling Stone magazine as 'The Prettiest and Sexiest Illegal Alien In History.'
SIDENOTE: Hayek is the executive producer of the TV series Ugly Betty and the spin off series, The Much Uglier Gretchen.
