Can a Top Chef Actually Appear on a TV Show Called Top Chef?

Funny story written by P.M. Wortham

Thursday, 2 December 2010

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I are a experienced shef.

Another reality TV competition based on an Oxymoron or two, the new season of Top Chef boasts another group of supposedly top ranked chefs who are so "Tops" in their field that they can apparently drop their restaurant duties to participate for weeks in a competition that "might" win them less than a year's annual salary. Really? Not really. Real Top Chef's make more than that and are for the most part, inaccessible.

Then again, a hundred thousand dollars is a lot of money to a little known sous-chef who normally makes $17 an hour. This is all that you need to create the tension and drama in the close quarters of a kitchen, knowing that tempers for the unprofessionals will flare under pressure. That and knowing that an assortment of knives waits at the ready in front of each prep station. I can picture the fight scene from West Side Story now.

Lending to the credibility of the show, or not, your hostess, Padma Lakschmi, whose claim to any sort of fame was earned as the temporary wife of Salmon Rushdie, doesn't appear to have any skill other than to comment on food prepared by those same Chef Wanna-Be's . Dumping the short, fat, frog faced and 25 year older troll for better opportunities, Lakschmi divorced Rushdie and moved on to an investment banker for whom we assume, she doesn't have to cook for either.

It's all quite odd really, but it fills up somebody's weekly cable TV lineup. You're better off watching the Iron Chef series. None of this "You have 10 minutes to make a dessert out of mushrooms!" Go to Kitchen Stadium. See real chefs. Witness real Competition. "A 'la cuisine!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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