Following the success of his opening show on basic cable in the U.S., Conan O'Brien's writers are now sequestered in a top secret location, banging out skits and bits to make Conan's return to late night TV, historic.
"It won't be that hard", says television industry analyst, Jackie Plaid. "If you're under 60 and are sick of the pabulum that comes out of that big chinned mook on NBC, you're going to watch something a little more hip, if you pardon the 70's reference", says Plaid. "The young crowd loves Conan, he's got a built in audience".
Fueled by his own personal Tweeter campaign, mostly because he was not allowed to do anything funny on television according to his separation agreement, Conan's fans have been anticipating his legal return to the small screen. "And this is cable", adds Plaid, "Don't be surprised if you hear a few more testicle jokes or a little more innuendo about the temperature of the studio if a guest's nipples appear a bit too pokey. I love that shit".
O'Brien's writers haven't actually been seen in three weeks, though reports are rampant about clothing and personal hygiene supplies being trucked in the studio, though the exact location for delivery is unknown.
There was a report of a man resembling Jay Leno circling the Conan studio in one of his many vehicles, in this case an Abrams M1-A1 Tank, but his identity could not be confirmed. After the street legal tank was seen with extra armor piercing rounds attached to the exterior, the writing staff has reportedly gone "Dark and Quiet".