False Alarm! Justin Bieber Not Dead Despite Rumors!

Funny story written by Bureau

Saturday, 23 October 2010

image for False Alarm! Justin Bieber Not Dead Despite Rumors!

A spokesman for teenage singing star Justin Bieber has flatly stated to reporters who attended his early morning news conference this morning that his client, Justin Bieber had only a flare-up of the sickness that canceled a recent concert in New York and is doing fine.

"This stupid (beep) happens so many times I could just (beep) shit! (beep beep beeeep!)"

"Pardon the beeping but maybe I have what the kid's got."

Apparently the rumor began when another spokesman for Bieber tweeted that Bieber was dead as a doornail. "He looks like a stiff little cupie doll".

However, this morning's spokesman, Ham Abrahmson, stated that the other guy was 'some local idiot posing as an agent for Bieber. I hope they find the Beep of a beep beep!"

"One thing I would like to mention before Justin talks with you early tomorrow morning. It seems... he has uh, well, changed a bit because of being sick for a little while. So don't be shocked. Justin is OK. But he's changed a little."

"For instance, he's now five-foot ten with black hair and a beard. But don't let that fool you. The doc says it could be permanent but probably not."

"He'll answer all your questions except anything about his past and family."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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