John Lennon's 70th Birthday By Yokel OhNo!

Funny story written by Bureau

Thursday, 7 October 2010

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If John Lennon had lived to be 70, Yoko Ono thinks he would have been more relaxed about the milestone than he was about his 40th birthday, according to a report carried by the 'Daily Blabbermouth'.

OhNo recalls the ex-Beatle fretting about reaching that number: "I can't believe I'm going to be 40!" she said he told her. "John was always following me around like a little puppy. So cute. Plus he had some talent though he lacked my vocal skills."

"I said, 'John, John - I called him, John....40's not so bad, you know? But he refused to listen and died 2 months later."

Sure as shooting, 40 was to be John Lennon's last year as he was later shot to death by a young man whom John had begged to shoot him because he couldn't live with a shrieking maniac and stay sane.

After finally finding peace, Yokel has made a career out of honoring John's legacy.

Next year she even plans a John Lennon Peanut Festival in Plains Georgia with the Carters.

Meanwhile, eight of Lennon's albums have been remastered and are being rereleased this week as single albums as well as two boxed sets. There is also a remixed version of OhNo and Lennon's 1980 "Double Fantasy" album...hopefully without OhNo!

Other projects will include: Ye Auld Apple & John Lennon Festival in New England, Run To The Sun With John Lennon in Newquay, Cornwall which features Volkswagan Beetles among other things and The John Lennon Watermelon Seed Spitting County Fair in Bear Wallow, Kentucky.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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