Katie Price, aka Jordan, shocked the world this morning with nude pictures displaying the results of her latest cosmetic surgery....a new penis!
The photographs, part of an exclusive report from 'OK' magazine, showed Jordan proudly sporting her new appendage.
Apparently, Price had the operation over a month ago whilst on holiday in Turkey, where the penis and testicles of a young bull were grafted in place by world-renowned plastic surgeon Murat Botox.
'Well, what do you think?' said a proud Katie Price, 'Isn't it fantastic?'
There's no denying that it's impressive. The penis itself is over two feet in length and the testicles are the size of two large oranges. Known for her excesses, Price wanted a super- size dick to complement her super- size tits and super- size ego.
Undoubtedly, this latest stunt of Jordan's will generate even more column inches than the 24 plus now sewn neatly onto her crotch.
Jordan has already received several lucrative offers from pornographic film-makers, all anxious to secure an exclusive film contract.
'I always said I had the biggest balls', said Katie, teasing husband Alex Reid, ' and now that's a fact'.
Jordan first had the idea for the surgery following the controversy about Lady Gaga and the rumours that she was a hermaphrodite.
' I saw that puny bulge and thought, I could do a lot better than that', she
said.
So, as husband Reid braced himself for the inauguration ceremony, we showed a picture of the ' newly enhanced' Katie Price to ex- husband Peter Andre.
Resplendent with trout- pout lips, massive false tits, botoxed to within an inch of her life and with the latest addition in place, what did he think?
'What a complete prick!' he said.
Couldn't have put it better myself.
