Written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 16 July 2010

image for American Idol's Lee DeWyze and Crystal Bowersox To Record "The Ballad Of Mel And Oksana"
A photo of Gibson's ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva, whom Mel now says is a Russian spy.

LOS ANGELES - American Idol winner Lee DeWyze and runner up Crystal Bowersox were in L.A.'s Sound By Sound Studios to record the Kara DioGuardi penned song, "The Ballad Of Mel And Oksana."

Kara said that she wrote the song as a protest of the way that Gibson treated Oksana Grigorieva, the mother of his little girl; a noted Russian pianist; and a really, nice soft spoken girl who can cook Russian food with her eyes closed.

DioGuardi went on to say that a woman should not be subjected to the harsh indignities and downright horrible humiliation that Mel from hell put Okky, as Larry King calls her, through.

DioGuardi says that the national public does not know the half of it. She said that Gibson made Oksana nurse her baby while Mel videotaped her to put on YouTube, TubeThis, Facebook, and YouBoob.

He also made her wear his boxer shorts and proclaim to the video camera that she is a closet cross dresser. Mel laughed as he told her to grab her crotch like Kanye, Snoop Dogg, Puff Dippity Dip, and most baseball players do.

When Kara first played the song for DeWyze and Bowersox both immediately liked it, especially the mandolin, cowbell, and glockenspiel parts.

Crystal said that she is certain that the song will go on to sell more copies than even "La Macarena," "Who Let The Dogs Out," and "I Kissed A Girl."

In other news. Internet blogger Perez Hilton revealed to Anderson Cooper that hardly anyone knows that he is really gay. He said that he believes the reason is because he does not lisp like Barney Frank, giggle like Clay Aiken, or wear glitter on his penis like Adam Lambert.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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