Susan Boyle inundated with TV offers

Funny story written by Proffitt

Friday, 19 March 2010

image for Susan Boyle inundated with TV offers
Sudoko with Subo

The hairy chinned warbler has potentially struck gold with offers now coming in from ITV, BBC and even Hollywood! 'Subo' as she is now affectionately known is said to be 'chuffed to bits' at the chance to get her mug on TV again so we took a look at the TV competitors.

First up was Five's offering - Sudoko with Subo which is their attempt at toppling Channel 4's Countdown. They wanted a scantily clad Boyle standing in front of a board, demonstrating the crazy game for yips. Only problem is Boyle is said to be a little slow with number puzzle games so this one seems unlikely.

Next came the Channel 4 offering with Subo does Sumo! They wanted to fatten up the bandy legged singer, dress her in a giant nappy and have her throw huge wrestlers around in a sand pit. Although Boyle was said to be game on with this one she later declined at the thought of sand in her beard.

Then there was ITV's offer to counter Bruce and Tess's Strictly Come Dancing. They proposed to have Boyle dancing a Saturday night away with Subo does the Mambo. Only problem is Boyle has two left feet.

The Beeb didn't fare much better trying to team Boyle with the lanky bore Jaime Theakstone to promote Subo Gets An Asbo. Here we were to see Boyle trying to live on a council estate receiving just £60 per a week and living on lard, however somebody pointed out the fact that she did live that way before her famous warble.

Finally there was America's Fox network who came up with Subo and her Gazebo where the shy crooner travels from state to state, unpacks her gazebo and delights all with hymns in various bible belt towns.

We though it best not to mention the XXX Channel's thoughts regarding Subo Goes Akimbo!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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