WEST HOLLYWOOD - Britney Spears has finally admitted what she has been denying for years. She says that her two nipples are indeed starting to point downward much like a hazelwood divining rod that is looking for water.
Spears was sitting at a local Starbucks when she noticed that several people at the next table were giggling and pointing in the direction of her two chest thimbles.
Britney turned to the admirers and said, "Say, why don't y'all just take a picture, it'll last longer."
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"Hey" the blonde diva remarked, "I said a picture not a whole damn photo gallery."
A little boy who was sitting next to his mother asked in a somewhat loud voice, "Mommy do you think that if that lady's husband kisses her two boo-boos it'll make the hurt go away?"
Britney overheard him and she pointed out "I tried it little dude, it did not work worth a damn, not worth a damn."
In other news. The Super Bowl runner-up Indianapolis Colts have decided against moving to Vancouver after all. The team owner said he saw pictures of Vancouver and it looks way too damn cold.
