The 2010 Grammy Awards: Hip Hop - Rap Categories

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 1 February 2010

image for The 2010 Grammy Awards: Hip Hop - Rap Categories
The Fa Shizzle Chumpz who won the Grammy for The Best New Rap Band.

HOLLYWOOD - The 2010 Grammy Awards were held at The Staples Center, which is home to the World Champion Los Angeles Lakers.

It seems that each year rap music grows to include more and more categories. And this growth has caused the Grammy Association to take notice and expand its rap music performances and presenters.

Some of the new hip hop and rap artists that are causing quite a stir in the world of rap are such bands as The Ghetto Mo Fo's, Dudes 2 Bros, and The Fa Shizzle Chumpz.

In 2005, there were only 7 rap music recording studios located throughout America. Today that number has more than doubled to at least 18,530.

This past year dozens and dozens of rap artists seemed to just sprout out of nowhere and onto the rap music scene from places such as Gimme Cap, Mississippi; Who Dat, Louisiana; and South Peckerwood, North Carolina.

The first rap artists of the evening to receive a Grammy was a trio of good-looking little ladies, The Gangsta Gals. The GG's hail from Detroit and this trio of 19-year-olds captured The Rap Chicks With The Best Looking Booty Grammy Award.

One of the singers, Kenyatta Badcaster said during her acceptance speech that even though they appreciate the fact that everyone looks at their industrial trunks they hope to start getting known for something other than their cabooses; like for their singing ability for instance.

The Grammy for The Best Rap Song By A Non-Dropout Artist or Artists went to the rappers Dudes 2 Bros, whose song "Hey Yo Mo Fo I Gots Ta Go So Let Go Of My Afro Ho Bro."

Hip hop artist Ice Face won the Grammy for The Best Rap Song That Does Not Mention The Words Police, Bitch, Bling, or Yo. The song's title is simply, "Howdy Ho."

The Best Rap Instrumental Grammy went to Balloon Doggy & The Fat Kat featuring Ho Ho Hilda. Unfortunately Balloon Doggy and Ho Ho Hilda could not be at the Grammies show due to a little legal matter regarding a stolen beer truck.

But Fat Kat accepted the Grammy for their rap instrumental, "No Wordz," and told the audience members not to worry about Doggy and Hilda because as soon as the festivities are over he is going down to the Los Angeles Police Station and bail them both out.

The Best New Rap Band Grammy went to The Fa Shizzle Chumpz, who two years ago were the backup band for Tatas LaHump, 31, who just announced that she is engaged to the The Hip Hop Top Slop Crew lead singer Miles Morganello.

The Grammy for The Hip Hop Song With The Most Words (9,713)went to Booty Bonnie & Bro Yo-Yo for their song "Fo Fo Fi Fo Fi."

[WRITER'S NOTE: That's 4,4,5,4,5.]

The rap group from Chattanooga, Tennessee, The Rap Sapz, received the Grammy for The Rappers Who Grab Their Crotches The Most Times During A Single Song.

This award, as in years past, is always extremely close and usually the first three places are only separated by three or four grabbings.

And the final rap Grammy of the evening was The Grammy For The Rap Artist Who Best Exemplifies The Hip Hop Rip Rap Way of Life.

This prestigious award went to 69 Cent, who just recently got out of Sing Sing Prison. He thanked everyone and promised that he will never again kidnap a policeman and risk the chance of getting thrown back into prison.

In a related story. This year's rap music Life Time Achievement Grammy Award went to Dr. Bro. Sadly, the 64-year-old singing former witch doctor could not physically accept the award as he is in "The Witness Protection Program."

Dr. Bro reportedly is presently residing in either Iowa, New Mexico, or Wyoming, but he did send word through Oprah Winfrey that he did request that his award be given to President Obama's two little girls, Malia and Sasha.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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