Tom Cruise Buys His 3-Year-Old Daughter A $30,000 Toy Replica of An Indianapolis 500 Race Car

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 13 January 2010

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image for Tom Cruise Buys His 3-Year-Old Daughter A $30,000 Toy Replica of An Indianapolis 500 Race Car
This is not a photo of the Indianapolis 500 Race Track, it is a photo of The Fargo 400 Race Track.

HOLLYWOOD - Tom Cruise has always said that his best role ever has been his role as 'daddy.'

Well, Tommy went out and showed his little 3-year-old princess that if mommy ever leaves daddy, it will be in her best interest to stay, or rather demand, to stay with daddy.

Cruise noticed that all of a sudden his daughter, Suri Holmes Cruise, had taken quite an interest in Indianapolis 500 type race cars. He said that one day he found her typing intently on the computer keyboard. He asked her what she was doing.

Suri, which in Swahili means little girl whose daddy and mommy are so damn rich, it could be dangerous, looked up and told her daddy that she was reading about the Indianapolis 500 Race.

Cruise was utterly shocked. Suri then told her daddy that the very first Indianapolis 500 race was run in 1911, and was won by Ray Harroun who achieved an average speed of 4 miles an hour.

She told him that as soon as he passed the finish line he hit a milk cow that had wandered onto the track. Harroun was completely covered with milk and thus began the tradition of the winner drinking milk in the winner's circle celebration.

Tom was so impressed that he told Suri to get dressed and they went out to Macy's and he bought her an exact toy replica of the 2009 race car that Helio Castroneves drove in winning last years Indy 500.

He had it delivered to their house, or rather mansion, and little Princess Suri took to the car like a skunk takes to stink.

Tom was asked how his little girl had done and he said that she did good and a couple of times managed to get the car up to 87 miles an hour which he said isn't too bad, considering the fact that she is only three.

When he was asked how he could possibly top a gift like that Tom smiled and said that he has already put an order in for Suri's fourth birthday present which will be an exact replica of a United States Air Force stealth bomber.

In other news. The newest member of the Fox News Family Sarah Palin says that she is just thrilled beyond belief to get to work with the likes of political commentating heroes of hers like Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity. She said that they have made her feel just like one of the boys, except of course for the fact that she shaves her legs, wears her hair long, and has a vagina.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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