Amy Winehouse Acquitted Of Assault, Now It's Greenpeace!

Funny story written by Bureau

Friday, 24 July 2009

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A judge has acquitted Amy Winehouse of assaulting a fan who asked to take her picture, saying that if she was a fan, as she said, she should have known better than try to flash a shot of her face.

District Judge Timothy Workman said he found the 25-year-old singer not guilty of punching dancer Sherene Flash in the eye after the fan asked to take her picture following a charity ball in September, to promote non-violence.

Prosecutors claimed it was a deliberate assault with Winehouse putting on her pair of brass knuckles first. But Winehouse said she had felt intimidated by the drunken Fish or Flash, whatever, and claimed she was too short to have hit the dancer in the face.

"I just got in some good body shots", explained the singer.

Winehouse shot to stardom with the Grammy-winning album "Back to Black" in 2006, but her music has been overshadowed by reports of drug use, beatings and maulings, run-ins with the law, a tempestuous marriage and attacking a beached whale.

"We were trying to get her back into the water and Amy sat on her blowhole", stated A member of Greenpeace.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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