Lady Gaga-- Pop Sensation or Tragic Cyborg?

Funny story written by nexus9

Wednesday, 13 May 2009

image for Lady Gaga-- Pop Sensation or Tragic Cyborg?
UFP Collection, catalog photo. (2009/Haus of Gaga)

It has been widely reported in entertainment journalism the family backround of the club music diva known as Lady Gaga. What was not revealed until late yesterday was that her father, internet auteur Joey "Jo-Jo" Germanotta, was secretly moonlighting in the fields of human genetics and robotics research.

In a surprising turn for wikipedia's pages, with the revelation, an unseen house of cards came crumbling down. Mr. Germanotta quickly admitted in a press conference at the Haus of Gaga compound to having fully engineered the house-music phenomenon Lady Gaga. For more than a decade he toiled in the night hours developing a simulated pop career for his blind and attention-starved daughter.

"What are you going to do? I take care of my babies." Mr. Germanotta was quoted as saying. The Haus of Gaga system was revealed in technical documents alluded to by Stanton Freeman of the Fund for Questionable Research. What has been made known is that implants in the ocular cavities maintain transmit location and remote talent-enabling data to external devices disguised as art house props, including even costuming itself. The staging and tour riders of Lady Gaga's performances have been notably confidential since her inception.

"Who knows what's going with those people? No comment!" said Salvatore "Sally So-So" Germanotta, cousin to the Yonkers, NY Haus of Gaga clan.

TheSpoof.com's managing editor Mark Lowton himself has made numerous phone calls and in-person visits to Lady Gaga herself though as of press-time, these were hotly refused. Stay tuned as the leak that broke this unusual chain of news has not yet come to light.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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