Written by Bureau

Sunday, 4 January 2009

image for All New Entertainment Gossiper 4
"Are you clapping for Britney?"

Barack Obama attended his first parent-teacher conference at his daughters' school Friday evening and liked everything he heard about his girl's testing results. The teacher said both girls are already reading and doing math at higher level than President Bush.

When Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin confirmed that her teenage daughter, Bristol, and boyfriend Levi Johnston were expecting a baby, the celebrity weeklies knew that a bidding war would follow for the first photos of the Palin-Johnston baby.

Baby Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston, born Dec. 28, proved those editors right. According to one source, bidding for the baby photos began at $100,000 and People won out in the end.

"If she could have squirted the little rascal out a couple months earlier, she could have gotten half a Mil", stated Governor Palin, "enough dough to pay for hunting wildlife for the rest of their lives."

With Britney Spears, who knows what we can say at this point. Once the biggest star on earth, she has gone, in the span of just a few years, from a music standout and international sex symbol to a total catastrophe. You probably caught that awful pic of her passed out during a holiday party on the Drudge site.

"But if we all clap our hands real real hard, maybe she'll get better. Ready everybody? CLAP! CLAP! CLAP! There. Let's wait and see the results."

A recent quote from Robert Pattinson (Twilight): "The stuff I find attractive in a women I always regret finding attractive. I always like a kind of madness in a woman... I like it when they hate me right from the beginning. Plus I hate any reference to my name. I wish people would just completely invent a new one for me."

OK. How about Doodle Dipshit?

Just kidding, you're a cute guy with lots of fans, Doodle!

After a recent issue of People magazine named Hugh Jackman as their "Sexiest Man Alive", according to an insider at the magazine, the next issue will name Rush Limbaugh as the sexest man alive!

Vanessa Hudgens is a 20-year-old singer/actress who is best known for her work in High School Musical. Of course, a naked picture scandal hasn't exactly hurt her in the publicity department either, although she now claims those were done by a stuntwoman.

She is presently dating co-star Zac Efron, or maybe that's just her "stuntwoman".

That's all from the Entertainment Gossiper!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Celebrities

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