Eastwood to star in next Harry Potter Film

Funny story written by Lorenzo Lee

Monday, 7 June 2004

Hollywood, CA - Studio executives at Warner Brothers have been gushing over with excitement at the latest news: Clint Eastwood is finally resurrecting his "Dirty Harry" character.

Slated for release in 2007, the film, aptly titled: "Harry Potter and the Dirty Hogs: Making Your Day," chronicles the transformation of young Harry Potter into hardened, tough cop Dirty Harry Callahan that debuted in 1971 in the movie "Dirty Harry".

"I feel like it's coming full circle now," says Eastwood, "and it's about time these people knew that I was the writer of these novels, not this J.K. Rowling character they keep mentioning."

"It's really a surprise story of how a young wizard ended up being a gun-crazy, schizo psycho cop. Of course, time travel will figure a lot in the story. And how he changed his last name from Potter to Callahan, that's gonna be a great twist," says Eastwood. "But I'll tell you a little secret: Dirty Harry Potter was a bedwetter..."

J.K. Rowling is apparently appalled on the move by Eastwood---the author is not sanctioning the movie, much like the much loved "Never Say Never Again" James Bond film that starred Sean Connery but was never officially sanctioned by Ian Fleming.

"This will probably be my last film, considering that I'm already 73---I've never made a film that appealed to kids, so I guess this is the greatest legacy I can give to them before I croak," Eastwood said, with a tear in his eye, reminiscing on Former President Ronald Reagan.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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